sitting on the edge of the sandbox, biting my tongue

January 26, 2014

A Long Overdue Fashion Post

Filed under: fashion, politics — Tags: , , — edge of the sandbox @ 12:49 pm

Check out this fabulous post by Jonah Goldberg on the late term abortion prima-donna Wendy Davis:

Last June, when the mainstream media collectively swooned over Wendy Davis and her shoes, I was overcome with Fremdschämen. The only problem is that I didn’t know what Fremdschämen was back then.

But now I do! It’s a floor wax and a dessert topping! No, that’s not right. It’s my new favorite German word. What is amazing, to me at least, is that I am only just now learning of this word, despite having a soft spot (right below my elbow) for fun foreign words (“I myself am overcome with Backpfeifengesicht right now” — The Couch). Even more surprising is that we live in the Golden Age of Fremdschämen, so you’d think more people would be using it.

So what does it mean? It means feeling embarrassed for someone else. But more than that, it means feeling embarrassed for someone else because that someone else doesn’t realize he should be embarrassed.

It’s a good piece, I almost feel embarrassed to take it on this tangent, but somebody has to say it, and it might as well be me.  Yes, I am embarrassed for Mrs. Davis.

This pair matches Wendy Davis’s nose

What is it, 90’s revival?  Remember when feminists embarked on reclaiming pink, the most garish shades of it, and called it empowerment? Take back that afternoon in 2nd grade when the patriarchal oppressor accused you of having cooties!  Pink is the new black!

In reality, few grown up women (and by grown up I mean over the age of consent) can pull a pink look.  The color should be used cautiously, particularly when it comes to shoes.  Muted shades are preferable, and even then it’s advisable to throw another color in the mix.

Try these if  you must

Why do feminists think that Wendy has their back with her ugly sneakers?  I imagine she wore nice stilettos when she met husband #2 who paid her way through college and introduced her to political movers and shakers.

Running shoes, let alone pink running shoes, are a sartorial version of Lena Dunham, what you’d call female gaze — and it doesn’t matter how much they cost.  They are a girl-bonding attribute with a touch of sugar-coated kindergarten nostalgia.  Unintimidating, so we can pretend that girls like each other, and that it’s the boys who hate us.  Personally, I don’t believe any of that crap and wouldn’t be caught dead in pink sneakers.  Ladies, do yourself a favor, buy some nice heels.

January 29, 2013

Little Things That Are Making Me Miserable

Filed under: education, environmentalism, fashion, journalism, politics — Tags: , , , — edge of the sandbox @ 9:33 pm

Facebook.  I tried to FB a while ago and couldn’t stand the… er… level of discourse.  Maybe it’s the people I know, or else FB reduces everyone to the lowest common denominator.  I wasn’t jealous of anyone I friended, quite to the contrary.  Every time I looked at my damn wall, I saw people broadcasting to the Universe that they are going to CVS to buy toilet paper — or some such.  A few couples’ PDA made me wonder about the fragility of their relationships.

Trying to decide whether to take my daughter to a Goth production of Prokofiev’s Cinderella is making me miserable.  I’m not a big fan of sanitizing tales, but I’m just not sure a 5-year-old enjoy this particular version.  I suspect the production is geared to grown children.  It’s only natural that choreographers are catering to hipsters in a city where they outnumber kids.

Smokers don’t make me miserable.  The ill effects of second hand smoke are vastly overblown, and I really don’t mind when people next to me have a cigarette or two.  What I can’t stand are the power trippers out to get smokers.  The formerly libertarian state of Oregon might actually pass a bill that would make cigarettes prescription only drugs.  I feel like hugging every smoker in this country of ours because when the smokers are gone, who’s next?

While outlawing tobacco, Oregon, many observers agree, is likely to legalize cannabis in the near future.  Here, in Cali, those on the hip side spent the last couple of decades joking that pot is now more socially acceptable than tobacco.  I’m sure this must be the case in both Washington and Colorado where recreational (what other kind is there?) marijuana is now legal.  And what do you know, CO is introducing a bill to set a limit for driving stoned.  It turns out that:

There’s a lot of pressure on lawmakers after legalizing pot. As the number of users grows, there is growing concern the number of people driving under the influence will as well. In 2011, the most recent data available, 13 percent of deadly crashes in Colorado involved pot.

13%?  Wow!  I recall the totally scientifically justified reasoning for legalization I heard all through my youth, that drunks do stupid things, like getting getting behind the wheel wasted, but stoners are just too mellow to get their tushies off their couches and therefore don’t drive intoxicated.

No word on how many accidents are caused by motorists impaired by tobacco.

I’m proud of my home town on occasion.  Last week, the one hometown paper that can tolerate me reading its pages printed a front page story about the effort of some goofy homegrown group to get the hometown Big 5 to stop selling the dreaded “assault weapons”.  Ours being a former navy town, the paper’ve heard from a few locals, including one reader who pointed out that the paper got all gun specifications wrong.  The paper retorted:

No one on the Sun’s editorial staff owns or ever has owned a gun. Officials at Big 5 did not respond to calls to clarify details about their merchandise.

So, basically, because they don’t know a certain subject they don’t possibly need to research it.  Hicks.

Another individual wrote on the subject of the grocery bag ban:

Cloth and canvas bags are the “ugly ducklings” of (reusable) shopping bags (“Treat Reusable Bags Like Dirty Laundry,” Jan. 17). They don’t hold their shape, being floppy. I can imagine people just throwing them away when they get too dirty.

“We” will wash our own bags. Oh, but of course, what about the many who don’t? Our food could get indirectly contaminated from someone else’s dirty bag, could it not?

Good questions.  If we can’t trust our fellow citizens to put their used plastic bags in a waste basket, we certainly can’t trust them to wash their cloth bags.  Lets legislate.

The dashing good looks of Democratic women had long been the subject of discussion of the right-wing blogosphere.  I hope my discussion of the sublime get-ups of Michelle Obama can be considered a humble contribution to the genre.  Do take a look at a representative specimen at Viking the Kitten blog.  EBL has Lena Dunham and Legal Insurrection — Jennifer Granholm.  I find all of these ladies hilarious, but my readers might prefer to plaque their eyes out rather than click at the links above.

OK, not everybody is blessed with good looks. But lets not go out of the way to make ourselves ugly

In any event, here is some news to cheer them up: universities are cutting assistant professors’ hours to comply with Obamacare which said professors enthusiastically endorsed.  No doubt they thought they’d benefit from Obamacare.  Remember when Pelosi promised that once O’care is signed into law, everyone can, like, stop worrying and join a band.  The sub-professorship class might know about brown nosing, which, to be sure, is an important skill in academia.  However, they seem to poorly understand how political power works in this country — or the world — or how the economy works.  Do you trust them to educate your children?

October 29, 2012

Desperate College Girls

Filed under: politics, Russia — Tags: , , , , , , — edge of the sandbox @ 1:28 pm

A few days ago I noted the eery resemblance between Putin’s party “Lets Do It Together” ad and Obama for America girls’ “do it in the voting booth” tees.  And now, in a desperate attempt to court them ladyparts, O released an ad starring somebody by the name of Lena Dunham comparing voting for a 50-year-old man with big ears to losing your virginity, which by some strange coincidence happened to be a remake of another Putin ad.  Behold:

The 26-year-old Lena had a chance to pull the lever for O[h-oh-oh] in 08, during his virgin Presidential election because raving about the 2012 early voting is like bragging about attending a Woodstock anniversary concert.  However, 08 shouldn’t be her “first time” either unless she missed the chance to vote for the guy who wed a ketchup heiress, which is hard to imagine considering her hard left tendencies.  Lying about her “first time”… tisk-tisk-tisk.

On Legal Insurrection we find an Aussie “first time” commercial, and learned that Ronald Reagan once joked about voting Republican for the first time.  I’m sure we can find more obscure instances if we dig deep enough, but how many of them obsess about virgin voting for a specific man?  It was Putin’s campaign that got a good deal of attention in the English-speaking world just a few months ago, not some obscure Australian politician recording that looks like a public service announcement. Plus, Dunham chirps about the voting booth curtains, which sounds like something from “Lets Do It Together” electoral orgasm.

Putin voting booth girl

She’ll probably be more flexible after the election

Towards the end of his vacuous 2012 campaign jump-started by “Putin’s Army” of shirt-ripping alleged co-eds, the Russian strongman issued at least three virgin ads.  The most famous one had a virgin discuss her “first time” with a psychic before heading to the polling place.  In the other two we watch virgins consult a doctor and a shrink.

I couldn’t find the ad with psychoanalyst, but the reference to it is here.  And speaking of psychoanalysis, wasn’t O[h-oh-oh]‘s mom’s maiden name Dunham?  Then we learn that whereas Obama virgin ad are cool and all, and, according to The Atlantic at least, only “old white men” can find a fault with it, Putin virgin ads were “creepy”.  Go figure.

Putin’s virgins were looking for a man who’d make them feel safe “like behind the brick wall”, but O[h-oh-oh]‘s virgin is looking for a man who’d make her safe with regulations like The Lilly Ledbetter Act.  (Lilly Ledbetter, is that her real name?)  Also, Putin ‘s quaint virgin was convinced that the first time has to be “for love”, after which anything goes, presumably.  O[h-oh-oh]‘s virgin wants “a great guy… who cares”.  She must be looking for an Earth-shattering experience… or not.

From Mitt Romney's high school yearbook

Etch-a-Sketch forever: Mitt Romney met his future wife in high school.  Don’t give up on love!

Even though Russian women outnumber their male compatriots by a greater percentage than anywhere else on Earth, Putin’s commercials are not geared towards women.  His ads were designed to project the image of masculine vigor and give Russian men something to identify with.  The Dwarf’s obsession with masculinity is a topic for a whole different story. The point I’m making here is that the women in his commercials are hot.

Obama, on the other hand, is targeting the single white female vote.  Dunham’s ad is described “sexy”, but it’s not sexy at all.  It is safe.  It stars a gal whose heterosexuality is not immediately obvious making innuendos about a non-threatening man twice her age.  She’s supposed to be the cool big sis — if parroting Putin is cool.  It might help the President to get out the desperate college girl vote, maybe, but he should have had this demographic bagged by now.

At this point I wouldn’t be surprised if O[h-oh-oh] would produce a Slutwalk Army, sort of like Putin’s Army, but Putin rented his girls from a modeling agency.  OFA will turn out moderately overweight chicks who spend their spare time filling out applications to grad schools.  And in grad schools they will, once again, find themselves outnumbering the men.

The Silver is the New Black Theme. Blog at WordPress.com.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 313 other followers

%d bloggers like this: