sitting on the edge of the sandbox, biting my tongue

March 2, 2016

Hillary And Trump: Compare And Contrast

Filed under: elections2016, politics — Tags: , , — edge of the sandbox @ 12:58 pm

Anticipating Drumpf-Clinton presidential contest, Salena Zito wrote:

[T]wo wealthy New Yorkers, neither particularly well liked in their parties, will conduct ruthless, calculated campaigns aimed at each other’s personal destruction in the hope that the electorate will find both so repulsive that they refuse to vote and only the candidates’ hardcore bases will show up.

I want to give them both a hand and do a short compare and contrast:

  1. Although “liberal” is much nicer sounding word, Hillary insists on being called progressive.  When Trump was asked during one of the debates how is it that he’s a conservative, he promised to conserve money.  And there I was, thinking that in 2016 for sure I’ll get to vote for a conservative for president.  Come to think of it, I might just do that and find a third party I can support.
  2. Hillary lived her life to put her bloated behind in the Oval Office, and so did the Trumpster, steadily increasing his name recognition to, eventually, put his bloated behind there.
  3. Hillary wears ugly clothes.  Trump puts his honest name on ugly buildings.
  4. Hillary supports abortion.  Trump, who avoided the draft in the 60’s, considers sex in the 80’s his “personal Vietnam”.  So, naturally, he supports abortion.
  5. Hillary’s significant other was a Rhodes scholar.  Trump’s current wife is one of those poorly educated he loves so much.
  6. Hillary would appoint the “living breathing Constitution” types to the Supreme Court.  Will the Senate confirm them?  Trump will not appoint anyone who’d overrule Kelo or Row — why would he?  The Senate will confirm the nominee.
  7. Hillary wants amnesty to create more Democratic voters, but she’ll be met with resistance.  The Donald is perfectly positioned to usher in an amnesty because his hardcore followers will fall in line.  He’ll keep promising that he’ll build them the wall and that Mexico will pay for it until he won’t built it, and in the meantime he’ll legalize everyone.  Well, maybe the short-fingered vulgarian will erect a mile-long barrier somewhere in Arizona in summer 2020.  More likely he’ll make the very idea of the fence radioactive.
  8. Hillary has one child by one man.  The Donald has several children by at least three different women.
  9. Hillary’s husband is old and low energy.  The Donal’s wife tops the lists of celebrity plastic surgery disasters.
  10. On civil liberties, both candidates want Apple to give FBI the key to our cell phones.
  11. Both the Clintons’ and Trump’s children are in the family business.
  12. Hillary hit the Reset button with Putin.  The Donald wants to be buddies with Putin. Considering his Russian mafia connections, he’s probably already dealing with him, even if indirectly. Vladimir, I’m sure, had read Art of The Deal, and thought, “Oh, OK, that’s pretty strait forward.  I can handle it.”
  13. Madam Secretary’s husband bombed an aspirin factory in Sudan.  The current Republican front runner wants to target terrorists’ families.  Whatever, he’ll leave it up to Russia.
  14. Although both candidates have Jewish in-laws, they are a bit shifty on Israel.  The Donald announced he won’t take sides and Hillary has dealings with Israel’s enemies.  Not to worry, though, as soon as the orange-colored candidate will find himself in a position to make similar deals, he will.
  15. Hillary once praised Democratic Senator and KKK member Robert Byrd.  Trump regularly retweets neo-Nazis and pretends he doesn’t know anything about the KKK and David Duke.  This is very interesting; he must believes that he needs them.
  16. Hillary is a big government economic travesty.  Trump is an even bigger big government economic travesty who plans to start a tariff was with China.  He might just deliver on this one because he needs the unions more than he needs some poor shmucks who want their border enforced.
  17. There is a crucial difference between them, though.  They are power-hungry megalomaniacs, but when Trump watched Tiananmen massacre on TV, he identified with the ChiComs: “When the students poured into Tiananmen Square, the Chinese government almost blew it. Then they were vicious, they were horrible, but they put it down with strength. That shows you the power of strength.”
    For some reason I find it difficult to believe that Hillary didn’t side with the tank guy at the time. I’m afraid she’s more like me.

I’m not saying I will vote for Clinton, but there is no reason to vote for Trump.  And come on, how bad will Clinton be?  She’s old and tired and clintonian.  She’ll triangulate.  The thought of the Clintons back in the White House is rather painful considering her family’s perverted history there, but at least none of their clan was photographed naked.  At least Bill didn’t go on Howard Stern to talk about her potty habits when they were dating, and she then married him anyway.  She subjected herself to somewhat lower level of humiliation.

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